


body forgive me

by simplesilence



Category: Original Work
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-30
Updated: 2020-01-30
Packaged: 2021-02-19 03:47:50
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 213
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22471351
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/simplesilence/pseuds/simplesilence
Summary: title from, and generally inspired by, blythe baird's "relapse" and "when the fat girl gets skinny"
Kudos: 1





	body forgive me

i am scared of my own thoughts sometimes

i should not wonder what would happen if i held my fingertips against a flame

let my skin blister and melt together

would i not have fingerprints

if the one thing that makes me "unique" is burned off will i finally fit in

i barely ate and then i went to the gym and i burned off a fifth of the calories 

"body forgive me"

how could i not starve myself when people call me pretty now

"you're so skinny i wish i could be that skinny"

why would i eat when people like me like this

~~the people that matter won't like me whether i eat or not~~

i know this is not good for me

but i do not deserve good

i had so much good and i ruined it i fucked it all up because i couldn't believe that i deserved happiness

there are five people i would die for

and five that i would live for

only two people make both lists

i wish i could tell them that

but they've moved on

each in different ways, but i'm not blind 

~~unfortunately~~

~~because some of the things i saw today hurt more than i'd like to admit~~

~~i haven't stopped crying~~

**Author's Note:**

> sorry.


End file.
